Art traction amongst species - Design 2d in text: March 2008

waffle

Not the edible type but the spoken stuff. To some, 'to waffle' is an art. A gentle meandering river of spoken thought collecting arbitrary mental jetsam and flotsam as it were, spreading out in all directions it may seem to become a mass of tributaries leading eventually to a sea of turgid meaningless stuff. Through it all should remain a shocking inoffensiveness, almost oppressive in it's hapless, harmlessness. If it is offensive it is not waffle, it is a tirade or diatribe. Everyone knows that. Personally I have never been able to waffle, I have tried oh how I have tried but alas it is a peak I have yet to conquer. Mount waffle, a mythical location set high in the sky forever bathed in... waffle.

hotel photography

Have just been looking at a photographic web site by a London photographer called Adrian Houston. He is the bloke behind the photographs in the Mr and Mrs Smith hotels photography book. Luxury locations all over the world. There are also celebrity portraits, landscapes, commercial campaign shots on the site. See what you think don't listen to me. www.adrianhouston.co.uk

changes

The Design2d site is not a commercial web site. It is a professional hotch-potch for sure, a gamut of products relating to a few varied activities spanning some years. Photographs, drawings, paintings, prints, text, web related design. It is time for a revamp. How often is that said about a web site every day I wonder? I will shortly give a breakdown of the content statistics and draw up a plan for the re-design.

incomprehensible ads

SAVE MONEY & EARN MONEY, IMPRESS FRIENDS & FAMILY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!

Fed up with nonsense schemes that are confusing and cost a fortune?

YES!

Let us offer you a jargon-free bargain!

It's easy.

Simply put, we can save you money with nothing more than our 1st class affiliations with sellers and lenders.

The affiliation agreements can be quite complicated but one general rule is that the affiliate (that is you) must have been referred to the lender or seller using an affiliate Id which in itself has been referred through an affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate. So make sure if you wish to take advantage of these savings that you register with the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate.

After initial registration any activity, whether purchase or borrowing or lending or selling is reported back to us and this is the information we will use to show how much has been saved and how much is due to be given back to the member of the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate. Generally as an affiliate we earn money by referring buyers and sellers or lenders and borrowers to the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate.

In a nutshell 10% of the fraction we save for each member of the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate is reinvested. Yes reinvested, back into the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate. Each affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate has its own affiliation agreement and different conditions and prices will apply to each affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate.

Although we will do our best to keep the information up to date regarding the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate in the communications with the Affiliates please understand that the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate may change at any given moment. The timing of the return of fees will also depend upon what is stated in our affiliation agreement with the relevant affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate. The savings will be available to the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate one month after the affiliation agreement states. This will ensure that enough time is given by the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate to report the details and the transfer of any monies is completed.

Its THAT EASY!

Any further information will be reported to the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate.

How much will it cost me?
Just $500.00 one-off fee

How much will I make?
It depends on the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate, but anything in the region of 5-50% of the fractional sum of the purchases or lending in any given quarter divided by the affiliate ID scheme agreed by the affiliate.

meetings

Friday is team meeting day at the offices of the Daily Object, probably the greatest journal, newspaper diary amalgamation to hit a sheet of paper since Robert Maxwell (RIP) sat on the can. Here we are (pictured below) discussing, debating, deciding, deriding, chiding, colliding and projecting ideas, thoughts, graphics, concepts and hairstyles with the skill, wile and guile of a team of brilliant publishing warriors.

I love this job I really do. Nobody could tempt me away from it with anything less than the offer of actual money. No way.
I'm proud, that's why; too proud to have spent too many long long hours, sometimes days working on the Daily Object through day and night then day and night again till we got it right right to the end of whatever that might have been whenever it was, for whomever and for why ever it was. Not leaving, not budging from the spot! That's me at that meeting table, I'll be there at sunrise, at sunset, shifting only for the cleaner to hoover under my chair nobody else, not until that page is perfect, that text succinct, those colours exact, the fonts immaculate, the layout stunning.
Actual money would be nice sure, I mean I could sure enjoy speculating on positive equity?
I want ideas as bright as my shirt, I see people down on the street from here on the 66th floor and I enjoy the fact they have to look up to see me with my nose pressed against the window pane and my hands on the hips of my cotton wool mix trousered legs.
I feel I'm conquering my vertigo for them!
Take your money and shove it competitors everywhere! Unless you have good benefits too..

repetition of data

Day one of the Daily Object begins. Its raining outside, but for a moment the downpour stops and light breaks through the clouds.

What a view I think. What a view.
It is as they say just "eye candy" though. It gives me no sense of relief. I'm still shaking from the recurring dream I have had every night for the last 3 weeks. It's Christmas, I'm an adult trapped in a child's body, mother takes me to the department store...to Santa's grotto, and....

pr & pr - coincidental abbreviation duplication or...?

PR as in 'page rank' and PR as in 'Public Relations'. A coincidental abbreviation duplication or part of a global conspiracy to create duplicate abbreviations of everything perhaps? I think there may be some fact in my suspicions. Such an occurrence would throw the efforts to create a shorthand more efficient world into a dark period of confusion and chaos?

In desperation to attempt to speak, quicker, we may thus find it impossible and never achieve any kind of life at all. Stuck we will be with massively long turgid sentence structures because some group of subversives lurking in their cynical camp somewhere, have destroyed our ability to say what we need to say quickly and get home for our tea. Preferably just before rush hour.

A sad time indeed.

BBFN (that's 'bye bye for now' NOT 'Batemans Bay First National')

thoughts about my rank

In life one is said to have rank and in web sites too, there is rank, a so-called page rank. Had a look at www.design2d.co.uk and saw Page Rank was 0 ! Zero, nought, nil, nada, rien, nowt, nothing, zilch. Call it what you like. In shock I looked at the 'then' links page and sure enough, unbeknown to me I had linked to some dodgy site, not pornographic or anything but some sort of leech-like link farming parasite thing and I think, gulp, it had sucked my Page Rank away.

Having cleansed said page I can only hope my so-called PR will return one day so I can hold my head high having attained a bit of 'rank' in this occasionally somewhat demoralising life...